screw the status quo. we need change and we need it now. we need not a leader who plays with words and public funds. we need not a leader whose years of service fall under the 'fiction' category. we definitely need not a leader who knows nothing. we require a leader who has conviction, who has the guts to change the seemingly unchangeable. we need... to prepare for 2007. Now.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

The Story of "Us" (Part 3)

A story is always written for the hero who saves the day. But was there any story ever written about the damsel in distress?

For mine's that kind of a story.

A forsaken love had finally betrayed me. Not that it was the type of love that I thought was everlasting. But it was something that took my attention away from what hurt me. I thought this man would take me away from a curse that I had succumbed myself willingly. At first, he did show me salvation. With his whims and charm, he began to amaze me, and later on control me. Strong that I was and my armor, I had been slave to his will. He showed me his world unknown to me. Amazed at first, I was overwhelmed and laid rest into his arms everyday. But later, I realized all the happiness that he caused was just superficial.

Because my heart still belonged to that sweet curse. And he knew it. And he played by it, until a lasting effect came destroying my defenses. He lured me to a trap that he thought I'd never escape. Must he have loved me for this? It didn't matter anymore. While he grasped me with claws ever causing my shortened breathe, like a bird stolen of it's peace and freedom, I broke free. But almost destroyed.

Away from all the troubles that was brought by a forsaken and deceiptful affair, I went off to where he could not find me. At least temporarily. Back to my homeland, to establish my own fortress of solitude. For it was all the power left that I could put into use at that time.

And with all the power that I had already used up, he found me. The author of my lasting curse. The one who owns my heart all along.

It was June, the month of the wedding bells. A sunny morning unknown to me at first, for the whole night before was one of the darkest in my life, I spent shedding the last of the tears that I had to cry for my recent unfortune.

I was in a hotel which is ironically named as heaven... "Shangri-la". It was the first one I could think of which is nearest to resembling my home. It is where I knew relatives who would keep me safe from the world, and who would keep my existence unknown to all for the meantime. But betrayal never left me- it was still bitter, but also tastes sweet. My presence was made known to the only man who could calm me. The only man who could pull me out of insanity. It is quite ironic- the man who took away my heart for the longest time now stood by the bed where I rest my body weakened by harsh fate, as my savior. And he knew he was the only one with whom I could be with for the next days. He now stood there by the hotel door more as a friend than he had been the enemy of my destiny years before. He has a unique light in his eyes, something that I'd learn to grasp and cherish later on.

He sat by and stared at me the whole morning. It was as if he had created this day only for me, and set aside the rest of his world just to be with me, just as he always did a long time ago. He thought I was deep in slumber but his presence had never failed to keep my senses awake and trembling. He threw a smile upon me the first moment I opened my eyes. "I got something for you..." he said. A white long-stemmed rose. He said he took it from an officemate who happened to have a bunch of them. I took it, felt the softness of it's buds and the sweetness of it's odour against my cheeks. And I thought tears already ran out the dreaded night before.

"Shhh... there now... I heard what happened to you... I'm sorry..."

"No, Elmo... don't be sorry. It's my fault actually. I let it all happen."

"But..."

"No... Elmo... you, here... it's all that I want this very moment."

This is all how it started- my return to life and my last bid to say goodbye to this sweet curse that I willingly accepted in my life. I now understand why, amidst all the hurtings and uncertainties, anyone would still submit one's self to this kind of story. It's better to have loved once like this, than never have loved at all.

(To be continued...)